Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Friday, August 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Summer movie Report Card Pt. 3
Horrible Bosses B- I thought the trailers for this movie were pretty good, but I’ve been burned plenty of times with these comedy trailers….anyone remember ‘Get Him to the Greek’, ‘Extract’? But…the movie has Charlie Day (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia….which is basically a vulgar Seinfeld), Jennifer Anniston looks 100x better than Cameron Diaz in Bad Teacher, and Colin Farrell as a balding douche bag boss…. They got me again…..this time, though, it actually paid off. Horrible Bosses was funny, entertaining...not the funniest movie this summer, but good enough for a matinee (do they even have those anymore?). Standout scenes were anything with Colin Farrell and anything with Jennifer Aniston… they basically stole the movie.
Friends With Benefits C The very first thought that came into my mind (and should have been to yours) when I saw this trailer was….haven’t I just seen this somewhere….recently… That’s because you HAVE! Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher were in ‘No Strings Attached’, just this past spring. I really didn’t want to see this, the trailer wasn’t that funny, and the fact that it’s the same premise as a movie that just came out earlier…(Armageddon/Deep Impact, Volcano/Dante’s Peak)…but dammit, I’m a sucker for the Black Swans….Mila Portman…Natalie Kunis….btw….is it me or does Kunis sound really dirty…..anyways….the movie isn’t bad, but it’s not really that great either…Justin Timberlake hams it up every other scene he’s in, he’s obviously a star, but damn dude, tone it down….The movie has it’s moments, the sex scenes are definitely raunchier than ‘No Strings Attached’ or any other comedy this summer….Bridesmaids included….although you won’t see Mila naked or anything…when you think you do, guess what…she had a body double for her ‘ass’ shot, which….goes beyond me? Anyways…if you want to see a better ‘romantic comedy’ this summer, check out Crazy Stupid Love, a far superior movie…
Cars 2 n/a I tried watching the first ‘Cars’ a while back….. I couldn’t even make it through the first 10 minutes… I saw the trailer for this, as soon as that redneck pickup truck (Larry the Cable Guy) popped up on the screen, I decided, F this, it’s gonna suck. Sorry I can’t stand his “comedy”. I know it’s a kids movie, I expect more from Disney…this is just plain lazy. If you want a review or grade for this movie, I can confidently say it’s an F+, even though I haven’t seen it.
Transformers: Dark of the Moon n/a Okay, Michael Bay. He was able to bamboozle me plenty of times, early on, matter of fact….I even LIKED some…(The Rock)….I loved the Transformers CARTOON and TOYS….I was excited when the first one came out, but then…..I saw it, and it was very disappointing….the moment Bumblebee peed on John Turturro, I felt insulted…. I started nitpicking at everything….why did they have to change Bumblebee into a Camaro? Why show all of Optimus Prime’s face? Ugh…. Whatever. So then the sequel comes out, I was willing to give it another chance…I mean sometimes the sequel is better right? (Dark Knight, Empire Strikes Back) Wrong. Michael Bay does not give a shit. In fact, he made it WORSE!!!! The twin ghetto autobots are unbelievably racist….I felt utterly offended….and I’m not even black!!! Well…here we go…part III. Bay claims to have learned from his mistakes and says this is better…nay…the best of the three…. Hell, even SOME reviews back that up….well….Fuck you, Michael Bay!!! I’m waiting on the DVD for this one. I’m not going to sit in the theatre for 3 hours, just for you to piss me off again.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 A I can’t really comment too much on the trailers for this, since I don’t remember that many trailers for it. Maybe it’s because it’s basically the second half of the last movie in the Potter series, maybe it’s because the studio felt that they didn’t need to put out a great trailer, because they have a built-in audience….or maybe it’s because I don’t give a fuck. The movie is good. Probably the best one I’ve seen the summer, or will see. From the beginning of the movie to the end, it was action packed, maybe it deviated a little from the book on some minor parts, maybe it didn’t make sense on others, but guess what? It’s movie about magic, in a made up world, so shut the hell up, it was fun, and even though it was more than 2 hours, the time flew by. I know, Transformers is the same way, in that I shouldn’t expect much from a movie about talking robot aliens, but…I do! I don’t expect an Academy Award winning film to be a summer movie, but I don’t want to some dipshit to lazily put shit together and expect me to like it….see that’s the difference…. You can tell the filmmakers and actors WANTED to make something good out of this, they tried….and succeeded. If you saw part 1, you may have thought it was really slow…blah blah blah….well this makes up for it…see it…enjoy.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Summer movie Report Card part 2.
Super 8 A “It’s like the Goonies and ET!” That’s what is often said about Super 8. Well, Super 8 HAS kids in it, they go on an adventure, and yes, there’s an alien trying to go home. But that’s not why I think it’s similar to those movies. I wasn’t initially impressed by the trailer, especially since I was still recovering from the nauseous “Cloverfield” movie, produced by J.J.Abrams. I grew up watching the Goonies and ET (more so the Goonies, considering I was only 4 or 5 when ET came out). I remember wanting to be one of the Goonies… I thought it was cool, that the kids had that much independence that they were able to go out and go through an incredible adventure, chase down a pirate treasure, and come out winners in the end…. Of course, there’s no fucking way that would happen in today’s world, where you have stupid knuckleheads and crazy child abductors… but guess what? Super 8 takes place in the early 80’s back when you COULD go out and play outside without the fear of being kidnapped….(well at least you could be naïve to it) I think Super 8 is more like the Goonies/ET, in that it matches the TONE of those movies. They were feel-good, adventure movies that took you out of what is going on now….it brought you into the movie, where you forgot your place in the real world, and could imagine yourself on the adventure as a kid… the story was serviceable and the acting by the kids were pretty good…(especially Elle Fanning, she’s gonna be a huge star someday) This movie felt like it was directed by Steven Spielberg, it looked like a Spielberg movie, if you didn’t know better, you would think it was a Spielberg movie. Well, it’s directed by J.J.Abrams and PRODUCED by Spielberg. Well done. (btw Spielberg only produced the Goonies) one more thing....make sure you stay for the credits.....
Bad Teacher n/a Trailers looked funny, unfortunately I was too busy to catch this in the theatres….which turned out to be a good thing, since this movie apparently sucked. Cameron Diaz is no longer attractive, but she does look good with sunglasses….since she looks like she only sunbathes her face…with no sunblock, until it looks like leather and her eyes sink in….anyways, the reviews were bad, which only kept me away even more. It’s too bad, Jason Segal deserves better.
X-Men: First Class A Now here’s a perfect example of when movie review get me to SEE the movie rather than keep me away. I saw the trailers and thought they were horrible. Let me tell you why…. X-Men: The Last Stand. Remember that piece of shit? I do. That completely destroyed the X-Men franchise. I hated it so much, that when the trailers for this came out, I could only see everything negatively. My first thought after seeing the trailer….”what the fuck is up with The Beast?... they might was well cast the puppets from the Dark Crystal…this movie is gonna suck….” After letting time go by and right before the opening weekend, I started to hear good things about the movie and was able to focus more on what really needed focusing on…. It was being directed by Matthew Vaughn, who direct one of my favorite movies, Layercake, he also directed Kick-Ass, which was pretty entertaining. The more and more I heard about it, the more I actually wanted to see it. Guess what. It was good. There are plenty of continuity errors in the movie, but that’s because the filmmakers want you to pretend like X3 and Wolverine never happened! If you can do that, you’ll enjoy this movie. It’s well made, goes by pretty fast and is very entertaining. It doesn’t FEEL like a superhero movie….not at first, at least…and that’s a good thing…
Green Lantern n/a Trailers for this movie sucked. I liked Green Lantern growing up. Movies like this and Thor are hard to make. If you see the source material, making a movie about a guy who gets a ring and can pretty much do anything with it, and fly around and shit is hard. If you’re gonna do this movie, it better be really fucking good, otherwise, it’s gonna fail miserably. Bad reviews and the fact that the bad guy, Peter Sarsgaard looks like this….
Monday, August 8, 2011
Almost the end of summer movies...2011 Summer Report Card pt. 1
Thor n/a First of all, the trailers for this left me totally unimpressed. This movie had several factors going against it, to me, BEFORE it even opened. A) I never really followed the Thor comics, growing up…I was more X-Men, Spider-Man, Batman, Punisher…. B) Avengers was another series I didn’t follow too much, and since a lot of the hype surrounding this movie (along with Captain America) was the tease of the Avengers movie in 2012 C) The trailers for this movie sucked.
The one thing this movie had going for it, to me, was Natalie Portman. There’s just something about her….ever since her “SNL rap” years ago…that does something for me… …and hey did she grow some boobs? At least that’s what you’d think after seeing the trailer…
Well, in the days leading up to the opening, with several factors going against the movie, it would take a tremendous amount of good reviews and positive word of mouth, to get me to make the effort to find a babysitter and pay to see this movie. Well, the reviews came pouring in, Rotten Tomatoes “top critics” total came out about 64%....not enough for me…. I guess Thor will have to wait until DVD for my take on him…
Bridesmaids A- Another movie where I wasn’t completely sold on the trailer, although the trailer was still waaay better than Thor. I like the “Judd Apatow” type comedies, but lately they’ve been getting kind of stale. Bridesmaids was pretty good… A-, but the more I think about it, I almost want to downgrade it to a B+. It was funny, Melissa McCarthy was good, a lot of critics say she stole the show, I disagree, she was funny, but let’s just say it was a good thing she wasn’t the star of the movie. Kristen Wiig seems to be on a roll though…her act is pretty much the same every movie she’s in, and on SNL. If you watch SNL, you know what to expect from her, I’m not tired of her yet, but I can see her schtick getting old pretty soon, so she better take advantage now. Anyways she’s good here, scenes that pop out are the opening scene with Jon Hamm and her “drive by” scenes….very hilarious.
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides n/a Trailers actually looked entertaining, what killed it for me, was the last Pirates movie. I didn’t think it was good, so in the words of W, “Fool me once…shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.” So just like Thor, (I’m gonna keep using Thor as a reference, so suck it up) it would take positive reviews to get me to bite…..Rotten Tomatoes “top critics” 29%. I’ll wait for HBO. ‘nuff said.
The Hangover Part II B- I know I shouldn’t fall for sequels that you KNOW are going to be the same damn movie as its predecessor. Hopefully if or when they do a third Hangover they NEED TO CHANGE THE PREMISE. Anyhoo, in this case, the original was sooooo good (and quotable…which is a huge factor, to me, in what makes a movie good) that unless the trailer made it look like a watered down version of the original (Revenge of the Nerds II, Caddyshack II) I was going to go see it. Well, the trailer came out, and it showed NOTHING of the movie, but was cool enough that yes, I was suckered into seeing it. Did I like it? Yeah….just as I thought it was exactly the same as the first, except you substitute Bangkok for Vegas. What I liked, though, was that it DID NOT water down the jokes, instead they took them a step further without ruining the movie. Ed Helms and Zach Galifinakis save the movie. Ken Jeong was okay….nevermind, the more I think about the movie, it’s actually his character that stands out the most. Where in Hangover, it was Alan who is the most quotable, I’d say in this one, it’s Mr. Chow. Standout scenes are the Thai club reveal “Stu you loved it, you were crying saying how special it was. I had to slow down so I didn't drop my load too quick”, and any scene with Mr. Chow. One last thing….and this is huge…*spoiler alert* the movie ends with a huge JUMPED the SHARK moment with Mike Tyson singing at the wedding….that was a very sad thing. I might have given this movie an A if it wasn’t for that.
Kung Fu Panda 2 A The first one was pretty enjoyable, I don’t put too much stock in trailers for “kids” movies… for me if I’ve seen the original and it was pretty good, I’ll take a chance and take the kid to see the sequel… KFP2 (see how I made the title really cool by using initials?) was pretty good, basically an ‘origin’ type story, explaining what happened to the Pandas existence prior to the first film. The action was good, not to many contemporary references (which I hate……you hear me SHREK!!! I hate you), and there was little room left in the end for a third movie, which I wouldn’t mind with this franchise.
NEXT UP: Super 8, Bad Teacher, X-Men: First Class, Green Lantern
as usual,
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If you're game, check out Sonarak and his blog...
as usual,
Follow me on twitter...
If you're game, check out Sonarak and his blog...
Friday, August 5, 2011
So this is Catwoman??
....eeeeeyyyyyeah......oookay......where we going with this....?
First of all, it tells us nothing of the context of the picture....
not to be tooo nerdy, but I can't believe this is really...THE Catwoman, I know Christopher Nolan's Batman movies are based on reality, so I find it hard to believe that he would have Catwoman withOUT a mask...
I mean, it's like Superman/Clark Kent, unless you're a total dumbass, any reasonable person can figure out that Superman is Clark Kent without glasses.
At least with Batman, he wears a mask, and changes his voice into a douchey growl.
So maybe this picture is of Selina Kyle testing the BatPod BEFORE actually going out and putting a mask on...
I'll give Christopher Nolan the benefit of the doubt before thinking Dark Knight Rises will suck.
In case you need a refresher:
Christopher Nolan: Memento, Insomnia, The Prestige, Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, Inception
The guy makes good movies.
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Testers needed....
Actually, I should have said, test subjects wanted.
Sonarak knows what I'm talking about......heh??? heh??? *air pistols* *bang bang* ladies??? *crickets* *blow the smoke from my air pistol* *back into the holster* that's right....
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Who's that thin dude, pretending to be Jonah Hill?
...at least in the opening part of this video, he's still pretty damn fat in the movie...
*warning* if you watch this at work, the actual trailer starts out with a him going down on a chick, and she's moaning pretty loud....so turn down the volume....it's a red band trailer.
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Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Anyone up for some Sushi?
Interesting. Images, direction look cool, but I can't stand that actor from Candyman. I'm on the fence with this one, but that final image of the "Sushi Girl" tips this into the 55/45 range.
Plus..does "Revenge is a dish best served cold" ever get old?
Plus Plus.... that's Mark Hamill in the fat suit with the blond wig..... yes the same Mark "Luke Skywalker" Hamill...
nerd alert.
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